Intentions

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Happy New Year! 2016 was a long roller-coaster of a year, it feels like it’s passed so quickly, but when I look back at things that happened I can’t believe it was so recent. Thinking back to all the lows, I’ve realised if I can get through those moments, and still have a good year, and still enjoy so many good things, that I can get through anything. So, I’ve set some intentions for this year. Nothing about climbing mountains, losing 12lbs, or sipping cocktails in Mauritius. Just things I think might make me happier in my day to day life. If I do them, great, it’ll make my life a little happier, and if I don’t, I’ll try harder next year.

  1. Eat Breakfast, lunch and dinner, no skipping, no cake as a substitute.

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Read daily – it’s good for your peace of mind as well as keeping it sharp.

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Clean and keep the place tidy – outer order contributes to inner calm.

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No spending – save for adventures, say nay to consumerism.

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Meal plan – save money, use up leftovers and actually cook decent meals.

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Connect. Doesn’t matter how – text, call email, face to face, a day, hour, 5 minutes, anything.

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Gratitude. Find something daily. Preferably a few things.

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Eat fruit and veg. Monitor how much and make an effort to eat more.

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Eat less sugar – and don’t act dumb when I do.

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Take photos. It doesn’t matter how bad they are, no one else will see them. Just do it, it makes me happy. Worry less about the outcome, and just enjoy the process.

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Take a self portrait or two, doesn’t have to be a selfie.

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Stop saving things for best. Celebrate today. Wear my pretty dresses. Use the bath oil.

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Remember that life is short. Remember this and live life more fully. Treasure my time, don’t waste it.

88d6375ffb97b43d947757b1413c670cWhat will your intentions for this year be?

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The search for the perfect makeup remover

I’ve been on the search for the holy grail of makeup removers. I’d like one that doesn’t leave me tugging at my eyes when I wipe it off or with scary panda eyes the next day. I can’t seem to find any official reviews I find satisfying online. Most of the ones I do find say that most of the products are about even, which from my own experience, just isn’t the case.

I’ve tried a couple but have never fallen in love with any. My first was Clinique’s Take The Day Off, which I found to be too greasy and I had to rub quite a lot.

Benefit B.Right Remove It make up remover was awful, too scented, didn’t remove much and stung like hell.

Garnier fresh eye makeup remover was good-ish, removed eye makeup, still tugged a little and very greasy though.

As much as people like Simple Kind to Eyes makeup remover, I didn’t get on with it, it didn’t remove my mascara at all and I really had to pull and wipe my eyes a lot.

I used the Mac Pro Eye Makeup Remover, but can’t remember much about it, which means it was either just meh, or it did the job so well that I didn’t really notice it.

No7 Beautiful Skin eye makeup remover was my go-to default remover until I found…

La Roche-Posay Micellar Water which is amazing and removed everything, but leaves my skin really dry.

Currently I’m using Soap and Glory Peaches and Clean, which is lovely, but I feel that it’s better for your face and it’s honestly useless on eye makeup, even if I scrub my eyes the night before, the morning after I still wake up looking like a panda.

I’ve been reading reviews and next on my list to try are Clarins Instant Eye Makeup Remover, and Dior’s Instant Eye Makeup Remover. I might also try the LancΓ΄me BI-FACIL – Double-Action Eye Makeup Remover, but we’ll see what the others are like first.

What I’ve learnt about depression recently

Recently I read Reasons to stay alive by Matthew Haig, and was surprised to realise depression is different for everyone. Matthew said his depression and anxiety was overwhelming, and some days he wished he just felt nothing. Mine’s the other way around; I feel nothing. It’s like I’ve flat-lined and I try to do anything I can to feel something again. In my head, I can see it’s happening, I’ll shout at myself to pull myself together, to appreciate things, or get angry, or sad, or anything at all, but I can’t.

But, after reading Matthew’s book, and thinking about things, I’ve realised that everyone has their own way of dealing with things, and it’s finding whatever works for you. Here’s a few things that help me:

Distraction. I know it sounds simple, and I always thought it was the dumbest suggestion ever made, and it doesn’t work, but it does. It’s finding the right type of distraction for you. For me, I’ve found it’s talking to people I love, being more involved in the outside world, as much as I want to just retreat. Even if it’s just by text, or email, stay connected with people.

Saying that, you can’t expect other people to save you. They can’t make you happy. Only you can do that.

Accept it. You may feel depressed, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s nothing you’ve done wrong, and it can’t be helped. Just accept it, watch it happening, observe it.

Try to keep moving forward, even if it’s the tiniest step, just keep moving.

Things will get better. I know it’s easy to focus on what’s happening right now in your life, and the future may seem pointless, but things will improve. You’re at rock bottom. There’s nowhere else to go but up. Think of your good days. How happy you were, how simple things were. There will be other days like that, even if it seems like you’ll never see another one again.

 

 

 

 

Some of the useless but pretty things I’ve bought

A glittery skater dress I fell in love with but have no idea where I’ll ever wear it
A stupid flower dress with the most exaggerated skirt I’ve ever seen, hence the reason I love it, badly made though so might send it back – iffy about it
I bought a beautiful cropped denim jacket that makes me happy every time I put it on with a dress
This plain black slip to put under dresses
1 long green maxi dress that makes me feel like a 5 year old goddess playing dress-up
This vintage styled green dress – the neck’s too high and doesn’t sit right, but I love it. It gives me tingles
Metallic beanie hat – I try to wear it slouchy with sometimes comical results – Stark laughing hysterically walking down the street in IOD on the way to Dan and Carly’s for dinner
Loads and loads of furry cushions and throws
Blue paint for the front door – while undercoating it white I decided not to paint it – complete waste of money
500 words you should know – I love this book, loved it from the moment I read the first page